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By Jane Mattes, L.C.S.W., Founder and Director of SMC
(Paperback, 243 pages, ISBN # 0-8129-2246-8)

Jane Mattes, L.C.S.W., founded the national organization, Single Mothers by Choice, in 1981. She has been a psychotherapist in private practice in New York City for over twenty-five years and is a single mother by choice. In this book she addresses the many unique issues relevant to making a decision about whether or not to become a single mother by choice, as well as the issues that come afterward — in particular, the “daddy questions”. Some sample agreements with a known donor are also included.

Partial Contents

Becoming an SMC by conception: Conception by donor insemination, Insemination with an unknown donor, Insemination with a known donor, Conception with a sex partner

Becoming an SMC by adoption: Agency or independent adoption? Open or closed adoption? Should you adopt a newborn or a toddler or an older child? U.S.or foreign adoption?

Pregnancy, birth, and postpartum: Telling people, Complications of pregnancy, The hospital, How to fill out the birth certificate, The postpartum period — home alone

The daddy questions: Preparing for the child’s daddy questions, Handling the daddy questions during each developmental stage, Dealing with the daddy questions in the community, If you conceived with someone you know, If you conceived with an unknown donor

Special child development issues for children of SMCs: Separation issues, The importance of a man in a child’s life, Disciplining when there is only one parent

Social life and the Single Mother by Choice: Social life, Dating, Marriage

Each DVD is $30 and the four DVDs as a set are $99

• DVD of panel with Grown Children of SMCs: What was it like to grow up in an SMC family?
• DVD of panel on Looking for Genetic Roots:  All children have questions about their genetic heritage. How do we help our children with their questions?? (Donor Sibs: Wendy and Ryan Kramer of the DSR; Adoptive families: Joni Mantell; Research: Rosanna Hertz)
• DVD of panel with Moms of Grown SMC Children: How they view being an SMC now that their children are adults.
• DVD of a talk by Jane Mattes, Founder and Director of SMC: What We Have Learned — The Past 30 Years. How does growing up in an SMC family impact the children? Tips for having a happy, healthy SMC family.

Order Now!

Each DVD is $30 and the four DVDs as a set are $99

(If you don”t want to purchase online you can send a check to SMC, PO Box 1642, NY NY 10028)

With your renewal you will get an updated Members Directory, have access to our 24/7 online Forum, and continue to receive your quarterly Newsletter.

With your renewal you will get an updated Members Directory, have access to our 24/7 online Forum, and continue to receive your quarterly Newsletter.

Buy a limited edition SMC 30th Anniversary Key Ring!

To commemorate our 30th anniversary, we made a limited edition SMC Key Ring. This is a silver key ring with our logo, in either green or black, on a white background. Once these are sold, there will not be any more manufactured, so these will only be available for as long as supplies last.

$10 each, $15 for two, including shipping & handling

With your renewal you will get an updated Members Directory, have access to our 24/7 online Forum, and continue to receive your quarterly Newsletter.

If you choose this option, you will continue to receive your newsletter and will have access to our online Forum. This level of membership does not include an updated local membership directory.

• Newsletter Membership is $35.
• Includes four newsletter issues, the name of the local contact person nearest you, and participation in our private online 24/7 discussion Forum.
• The Newsletter  subscription is included in your annual membership, so please do not order this if you have already joined.

Full Membership is $55 for the first year and includes:

• A Directory of Members for your area and the name of the local contact person(s) nearest to you.
• Participation in our private online 24/7 discussion Forum.
• A Resource Packet containing resources for donor insemination and adoption.
• A one-year subscription to our quarterly newsletter.

Your materials and contact information will be sent to you via email and 1st class mail within 7 to 10 days after you join. There are a limited number of partial scholarships available to those with financial need. Some local chapters may have additional fees.

Please note: membership in SMC is limited to single women who are or will be raising their children alone.

Donation to SMC

A candid and touching documentary about a group of single women in New York City who are actively pursuing motherhood – without the participation of husbands, lovers or boyfriends.

These are not strident political activists trying to make a point but rather real, ordinary women who have not been able to find a partner willing to commit to a relationship, marriage and/or fatherhood. They are women who always thought that motherhood would be a part of their lives and, with the proverbial clock ticking, have found themselves forced to make a difficult choice- go it alone or go without.

“Compassionate, humorous – a warm-hearted group portrait.” – New York Times

“I was so deeply affected by the film. It was MY story, all of it. It was the story of our entire collective longing to be mothers.” – SMC Member