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Welcome to Single Mothers by Choice!®

Maureen and Mom AMISingle Mothers by Choice (SMC) was founded in 1981 by Jane Mattes, LCSW. Since then, over 30,000 thinkers, tryers, and mothers have enjoyed the benefits of membership.

Who is a Single Mother by Choice (SMC)? An SMC is someone who decides to become a mother, knowing that they will be the sole parent of their child – at least at the outset. Our organization’s primary purpose is to provide strong peer support and information to those who are considering, or have chosen this path.

Our members benefit from SMC peer support all over the US, and in Canada, Europe, and beyond, both through local chapters and/or through our active 24/7 online private Discussion Forum and Newsletters. We are delighted to share our experiences, wisdom, and resources about single motherhood by choice, including Forum topics like Thinking, Planning and Preparing to Become an SMC, Donor Insemination, Adoption, Parenting (from infants to kids in college, and beyond!), and cohort threads for those trying to conceive in the same cycle, or who are pregnant and share a due date.

Single Mothers by Choice is an inclusive organization and all female-identifying, gender non-conforming, or gender non-binary people are welcome.

Learn how you can join and benefit from our community today!


Listen to a Podcast About Single Mothers by Choice

https://progyny.com/podcast/episode-27/?fbclid=IwAR14iSCZJlEQgeu_AjUr39OQs04wbQ5URc9zdpCCXIDhmyJMBAfS3elPhhI



SMC SINGLE MOTHERS BY CHOICE is a registered trademark of Single Mothers by Choice Inc.

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Child of My Dreams

To the Child of My Dreams:

Since I was a very young child I’ve dreamed of holding you in my arms…. looking into your face and seeing some of myself in you…watching you grow and develop some of my characteristics (good ones, hopefully). It seems now that that will not be the case, and I am extremely sad about that.

I’ve tried so hard to create you, but my body will not cooperate. Each of the nine times that I’ve tried, I could sense your presence with me…your little soul ready to come into being. I’ll never understand why it could not happen for me. Each time I was devastated and cried because I felt I had really lost you…even if you were only in my dreams.

Now it seems that I will say goodbye, but only to part of my dream. I need to mourn the loss of a Continue reading

Good Lord!

headbrainjpgGood lord”, said my therapist when I told her I was trying to have another baby with my husband. “You haven’t even recovered from your other 2 baby losses. And all you do with your husband is fight. You don’t even seem to like him.”

“Good lord”, said my therapist when I told her about all the infertility things I was now going through again, for a third time. The mood changing Clomid, every diet known to increase fertility, 2x a week acupuncture, awful tasting tea made by a Chinese only Chinese pharmacy in Chinatown, and lots of lots of awful, awful timed sex, timed with the very best in $299 ovulation predictor kits. “Are you sure you want to put yourself through this now? I think you should SLOW DOWN you’re not even 35 yet. And you and your husband are not getting along.

”Good lord”, said my therapist … Continue reading

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