I am pleased to announce our blog for the Single Mothers by Choice (SMC) organization. I started SMC in 1981, soon after I gave birth to my son, Eric. I wanted support from other women like me (37, single, educated) and although this was before the Internet, by the miracle of networking and word of mouth, several of us found one another and began meeting in my NYC living room.
We were all in our 30’s, and were in varying stages of the process (thinking, trying to conceive, pregnant, adopting, new single mothers by choice). We realized quickly that although we were from differing backgrounds and points of view, we had an important bond — we wanted to share our experiences as new single moms who were parenting alone, and also wanted to provide support and information to women who are thinking about or working on becoming single mothers by choice.
We became more organized as we grew in numbers, and we started chapters in other large cities across the US. We felt strongly that there was a need for a support network for women who were at the beginning stage of thinking about whether or not this choice would be right for them, as well as for those who had already made the choice to become SMCs, and we have been providing that network since our inception.
Fast forward to today…….. many thousands of women have passed through our doors. About 50% of our new members are “thinkers”, as we call those considering this decision. A large percentage have decided to become single mothers by choice, and a reasonable percentage (about 30%) have decided not to.
What was back then a new concept (mature single women CHOOSING to become single mothers?! Most people didn’t know anyone like us) is now a well-established trend in our society. At this point, pretty much everyone knows someone who has done this, and we’re better-understood. We’re not radical feminists, we’re not anti-men, we’re just women who want to make an active decision about having or adopting a baby before it’s too late.
Watch this spot for posts from our members about their experiences on their journeys and we invite you to visit our website, www.singlemothersbychoice.org for more information about our services!
Jane Mattes, LCSW, Founder and Director, SMC