Tag Archives: Guilt

Boy, oh Boy!

“You’re having a … boy!” I remember the moment I got this shocking news as if it were yesterday. The autumn sun blithely filtered through the patio window, as I sat at the edge of my bed and took the call from the genetic counselor. As soon as she said the words “boy,” my heart sank to the pit of my stomach and I almost fell of the bed. Thump.

That queasy, uneasy feeling stayed with me all during my pregnancy. It’s called gender disappointment and it’s real. At first though, I was really ashamed to admit it. After all, it had taken me ten tries to have this miracle! And it was a miracle indeed – after 2 failed IVFs, I had conceived… on a last unmedicated Hail Mary insemination. My baby was genetically normal and healthy! How dare I feel anything but unadulterated joy?!

Luckily, I was part … Continue reading