Last year I lit the candles before dinner, and she would sit at the table, look over to the menorah, and sign out “ohhhhh”. She thought it was pretty. This year she selects the candles each night. And while I have tried to get her to help me light the candles, she gets a little frightened when the time comes, maybe because I am trying to tell her to hold the shamos candle at the bottom, not the top. But she is fascinated watching the flames, and watching the candles melt. The first night we waited till all the candles were out to go up to bed, but last night she needed a bath. And one of the first things she said after we came downstairs this morning was “the candles melted, they’re all gone”. This is the first year I’ve done presents each night, and she is only marginally … Continue reading
Tag: HOLIDAY
This is the season to think about all we are grateful for. Of course, I am grateful for the kids, having a roof over our heads, our good health, having a career, our pets—all the basics. *Yawn*
But there are some things I am grateful for that fall outside of the usual realm of gratitude lists. I would like to share those here:
Most days I can still run faster than my four year old. That is good because occasionally he still decides to explore “over there” and goes for it at top speed, ears “off”.
I am strangely proud that my son is smart enough to be manipulative. Talking in his version of his sister’s high pitched voice, telling me that she wants ice cream…and, well, okay, he would take a little, too.
I am continually impressed with the heights my daughter ascends to and that she is strong
As usual, time has gotten away from me and a holiday is fast approaching. I was going to dress up as Supergirl for Halloween; mostly because I have the costume and there’s a television show about her. Then it hit me…why not dress up as myself?
Supermom.
I manage two little lives, taking care of all their needs and many of their wants. I give boo-boo healing kisses. I run our home, which needs a ton of work, but is still standing. I work full-time, plus some each week. I drive long distances so my kids will be with people I trust while I am supporting us. I keep my title of “Mom” by earning it with sweat and diaper-changing equity. I don’t go out “adulting” often because I prefer to spend my time with my babies. I even keep our many pets fed and watered, if not played … Continue reading
Normally I wouldn’t do anything for my birthday, but my nanny had asked for a personal day sometime soon to take care of some errands, so we arranged to do that on my birthday.
It was a perfect day.
Calliope and I walked to breakfast at a local cafe. Then we came home and she took a too-short nap while I worked out. But she was in a great mood throughout, despite the short nap.
In the afternoon, while Calliope “rested” in her crib, I worked on a photobook I’m creating which will be the Story of Calliope, all about Calliope’s conception.
Then we played with her friend Eleanor for a little bit at her house — Calliope (who is learning to walk, but isn’t there yet) pushed Eleanor (who is even further from walking) around on her push “bike” — and then Eleanor and her mother took Calliope and … Continue reading
I gave up making New Year’s resolutions a long time ago. I always aimed too high and set myself up for failure. What’s more, I’m making resolutions all year ‘round, so there doesn’t seem to be much point in forcing myself to come up with new ones just because I’m hanging up a new calendar. (Oops, there’s a resolution: upload the new photo calendar to the Costco website before February!)
So, how did I spend New Year’s Eve? We were newly home from having spent Christmas in Phoenix with family, the girls were in bed, and I was enjoying a quiet, cozy evening with a book and a glass of wine. What once would have been considered a New Year’s Eve FAIL —sitting home alone— now felt like bliss.
And I remembered that, several years before I had my kids, I had improvised my own New Year’s Eve ritual. I … Continue reading
I was a huge fan of The X-Files in the 1990s, and one of the show’s catch phrases was “I want to believe.” I had no idea how that phrase would eventually come home to roost.
I really didn’t expect that my daughters would still believe in Santa Claus by the time they were in 3rd grade. I’d be surprised if all of their Christmas-observing friends still believe, and I find it unlikely that none of the non-believing, worldly-wise 3rd graders has spilled the beans. The right jolly old elf hasn’t come up much in conversation this year, and my hunch was that they had their doubts, but maybe weren’t ready to ask the question outright, for fear of having their suspicions confirmed.
When I imagined having kids I also imagined that bidding the Santa days good-bye would be accompanied by a feeling of loss. I’m all for fostering magical … Continue reading
Last month at youth group, when my son was asked what he was thankful for, he said, “everything.” And I’ve been thinking a lot about that … how he knows at nine to be grateful for the rain and the sun, for pain and joy.
This year isn’t ending like I thought it would, but that doesn’t mean I’m not grateful beyond belief. For closed doors and new beginnings so good that I didn’t dare dream of them myself. And for God’s grace to sustain me between the two.
For friends who are present and friends that teach me lessons. For family that’s got my back and the ones who drive me crazy (sometimes the same ones).
For doctors and medicine and treatment and access to them.
For youth group kids who teach me something new every time I’m around them. A church family of kindred spirits.
For stores who … Continue reading
For a good part of my adult life, I wanted to be a mother, but as I got older, I worried that it might not happen for me. I hadn’t met the right man to marry, so how could I become a mom? But then, one day, I realized that even though I hadn’t found my life partner, I could be a single mother by choice. There was even an organization that provided support and information to women like me: Single Mothers by Choice (SMC), for women who were mature, ready for motherhood, but single. It WAS possible. Months later, I had made my dream a reality. I was a mother.
Motherhood was the joyous center of my life for many years. I had enjoyed my career and had a pretty satisfying life, both before becoming a mom and throughout my mothering years. But there was something about being a … Continue reading
I gave up making New Year’s resolutions a long time ago. I always aimed too high and set myself up for failure. What’s more, I’m making resolutions all year ‘round, so there doesn’t seem to be much point in forcing myself to come up with new ones just because I’m hanging up a new calendar. (Oops, there’s a resolution: upload the new photo calendar to the Costco website before February!)
So, how did I spend New Year’s Eve? We were newly home from having spent Christmas in Phoenix with family, the girls were in bed, and I was enjoying a quiet, cozy evening with a book and a glass of wine. What once would have been considered a New Year’s Eve FAIL —sitting home alone— now felt like bliss.
And I remembered that, several years before I had my kids, I had improvised my own New Year’s Eve ritual. I … Continue reading
This is a compilation of posts by some of our SMC members. They were posted on our lively online discussion Forum, inspired by the Thanksgiving holiday. Good Thanksgiving wishes to you all!
I am thankful for:
My two beautiful, healthy, smart, funny girls.
My amazing family, who are supportive, though many miles away.
My job, which was at risk for many months, but is once again mostly stable and secure.
My friends, without whose help some weekends would last months, and who have provided a local family for my family.
The internet, without which I never would have found SMC and the incredible community of women you are.
Parents who, after struggling to accept me, are excited and supportive of my journey.
Friends, past, present and future, some of whom are other SMCs I’ve met through this wonderful community.
I am finally on my way to building the family I’ve … Continue reading