Tag Archives: Making Changes

Waiting and Planning

When I started this journey I had no idea there was even a term for having a baby solo. The phrase “Single Mother by Choice” came into my line of vision in a Google search.

My neighbor started this baby party. She was hitting forty in months with no man on the horizon; she was ready to be a mother. I was 36, soon to be 37, and thought I had a whole bunch of time to find the husband and have the babies.

I attended three painful seminars at the local Reproductive Endocrinologist’s. My age was plastered in every presentation as presenting a big dilemma to my dreams of children. A review of my situation made it clear that I had many dilemmas not just one.

A bad economy, underpaid at work, a house underwater. I am living in the south when my entire family living in the north … Continue reading

The Last Five Years

Recently, I randomly took a few minutes to figure out the number of days I was with my ex-husband. I then counted forward the same number of days from the day we split up . I am now at the point that I will have been apart from him for as long as I was with him. It’s not really a meaningful moment, but it does cause me to reflect on the past five years.

After we split up, I was a mess. I had been battling severe depression and anxiety during most of our relationship, and the breakup caused me to spiral very dangerously. The relationship, in its last 2 years or so, was extremely detrimental to my sense of self-worth and I ended up feeling like a failure for having a hard time finding a place for myself in the workforce. My spouse encouraged me to make as

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