My Only Regret is That I Waited So Long

I’ve always wanted to have children, always wanted to mother. I’ve been an au pair to other families, spent time with all of the kids of friends and family. I hoped and assumed, of course, that I would have a family of my own when the time came.

I suppose that’s the tricky part – that time thing. Like many, I’ve been in a series of long relationships that have not withstood the tests of time. A long medical training that I started when I was twenty-eight ended ten years later. And there I was, at thirty-eight, for the first time seriously thinking of having a child on my own.

So many questions came to mind – how could I do it? How could I make it work in time and money and love? And most importantly, would it be, could it be fair to bring in child into the Continue reading

The Cost of Solo Motherhood – Year One

HOW MUCH DOES A BABY REALLY COST IN THE FIRST YEAR? WHAT I AM PLANNING TO SPEND.

BABY EXPENSES FOR MONTH 0 – $2,500

Before your baby is even born, you will need to buy a lot. We’re talking bassinets, clothes, stroller, etc. The cost of what you choose to spend here can vary drastically. Luckily, if you are an SMBC who is having a baby later in life like me, you’ll have friends who are happy to loan you the old baby necessities that they no longer use. Plus, if you have a baby shower you are sure to get a lot of the gear you need. Costs can span a wide range, I’m trying to budget about $2,500 of my own money to get me set up in a functional way for solo motherhood.

MONTH 1 – THE NEWBORN PHASE – AROUND $300

The birth of my baby … Continue reading

The Power of Yes

If you’re a parent, chances are you’re very familiar with the word “no.” You probably hear it from your kid(s) on a regular basis, and you likely hear it coming out of your own mouth quite frequently as well. Unfortunately, in modern parenting, “no” is hard to avoid. There are little no’s — like when I ask my 8-year-old what he wants for dinner and he says “can I have a cookie?” — and then there are big no’s, like when your toddler reaches for a sharp knife or a hot stove; and most of us have times when it’s hard to tell the difference.”No” is a word that, like many other words, loses potency with too much repetition. Anyone with kids can tell you that after a while they almost seem to stop hearing “no” unless it’s said with special emphasis or in special ways.

I’ve found that at

Continue reading

The Power of Yes

If you’re a parent, chances are you’re very familiar with the word “no.” You probably hear it from your kid(s) on a regular basis, and you likely hear it coming out of your own mouth quite frequently as well. Unfortunately, in modern parenting, “no” is hard to avoid. There are little no’s — like when I ask my 8-year-old what he wants for dinner and he says “can I have a cookie?” — and then there are big no’s, like when your toddler reaches for a sharp knife or a hot stove; and most of us have times when it’s hard to tell the difference.”No” is a word that, like many other words, loses potency with too much repetition. Anyone with kids can tell you that after a while they almost seem to stop hearing “no” unless it’s said with special emphasis or in special ways.

I’ve found that at

Continue reading

“I felt at home in SMC and being around others who had the same dream was a great help. SMC support gave me confidence and encouragement throughout the process and the benefit of meeting other women who were on the same journey.”

– Anonymous